Thomas & Sara

10 Years Of Friendships, Here’s To 10 More

Today I’m going to talk about something slightly personal, but it’s been on my mind for a few days (or more) so I’d really just like to get it out there. Two years ago yesterday, Tom posted his engagement letter. Ten years ago yesterday, I reluctantly joined the new forum of a chat room I’d been apart of for a few years. Ten years ago yesterday, I decided to write a story with five other people that would change my life forever. Ten years ago yesterday, I made some of the best friends I’ve ever known. Ten years ago yesterday, I met the boy that would grow into the man that would one day be my husband. And for an entire year, I didn’t know any of their real names. And a month from now, but three years ago, I met Tom in person for the first time.

I guess what I’m trying to say is, I’m so grateful that I was brave enough to sign on to that forum. To take heat from friends and family when I spent my summers on the computer writing instead of outside at the beach. I’m grateful that even though almost everyone around me was saying, “it’s just online“, that I didn’t care. That I held true to my feelings. Let’s be honest, having online friends or even BFFs is not all that surprising anymore. Being on the internet isn’t just cool, it’s commonplace. But I assure you if you didn’t experience it yourself then let me tell you, ten years ago it wasn’t. Ten years ago if you were online or had friends online, or had an online boyfriend, you were ruthlessly made fun of. Ten years ago nobody understood that you could actually care about someone like a brother or sister without knowing their last name, or having seen their face. Well let me tell you something about that. When I moved away from my best friend and was feeling a little strange at my new school, these friends were there for me. These friends would talk to me well into the night, these friends would help me study, they’d help me with social problems. We created stories together, we played games, and some of these friends I still talk to today. I knew, and I really mean this, that if I was ever really in trouble- I could contact or call any one of these friends and they’d be there for me. That’s saying a lot at sixteen, I think.

I had every intention of letting yesterday go unmarked (at least on this blog), but as I got ready to post pictures of the strawberry festival, I really just couldn’t. Some of you may remember when I was a part project called Life According To Us, which was a few years ago now. Those of you that don’t know, it was a videolog project where five people posted a video each day during the week and some were ridiculous while others were personal. Inevitably the casts grew pretty close. Well, last week two of the cast members met up in London. (One is from the US and the other from Portugal!) And as I am writing this post I’m finding myself pretty choked up.

People are people are people, behind a screen or not. And if you care enough, if you’re brave enough to let that person behind the monitor see you, you can create some of the best friendships of your life. Friendships that aren’t based on social standing or looks or certain scenes, but instead that are based in conversation, mutual interests, and intellect. These are the friendships that are worth everything. Obviously you can meet friends like this offline too, and I absolutely have and treasure them deeply, but I guess what I’m saying is that it’s okay to meet them online too. Meeting them online doesn’t make your relationship any less substantial, any less important, or less anything. There’s still a stigma with meeting people online but I think, I hope, that’s changing.

Here’s to all the people I’ve met in the last 10 years who I’ve met online, and to the dozen more I still have yet to meet. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.







   

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16 Comments

  • Reply
    Jessica Johnson
    28 Jul 2011 at 4:21 pm

    D’aww LATU. I remember watching you guys! I came in as it winded down to watch, it was great! And, people felt the same about my dating my husband from junior high on and never seeing him during school. And, that was just on that low-level. So glad you met Tom and the like!

  • Reply
    Mom
    25 Jul 2011 at 1:51 pm

    You youngsters will change the world! 🙂

  • Reply
    sheri
    25 Jul 2011 at 10:59 am

    what a nice post, I totally agree about online friends, I have many I treasure

  • Reply
    michelle
    24 Jul 2011 at 5:46 am

    It has been fantastic getting to know you and being a small part of your life 🙂 It really has meant a lot to me to have met someone extremely supportive and to have been included in activities, discussions and events. Having friends like yourself and Bron has brightened up my life completely.

  • Reply
    Lauren
    22 Jul 2011 at 5:33 pm

    As someone who’s been online since you hooked your computer up to the phone jack in the wall & dialed in at 2400 baud, I totally get this!

    I met a junior high boyfriend over something called the Cleveland Freenet. I made several friends – some I talked to on the computer only, some we chatted on the phone & a special few I even met and spent some time with. My life changed dramatically as I went through high school and college, though I never lost my confess for speaking to friends online.

    After college, my online life got away from me. Think working 3 jobs just to make ends meet. There wasn’t any time for luxuries like Internet service.

    Fast forward a few years and life has been me move from Ohio to Texas to Colorado, where I both met and married my husband, offline. Shortly after getting married, I began to develop some hobbies – mainly scrapbooking and photography (though I’d love picture taking from an early age). Around the same time I got myp first laptop and discovered the joys of wireless Internet. Naturally, I found my way back to the world of online friends and this time it was people with a common interest.

    Through my current online friends I have come to meet some great women and several even live only a few hour drive from me. And although we only get together once every couple of months, it’s just amazing to me how the most unlikely of friends can become so close because pretense is removed online.

    • Reply
      Lauren
      22 Jul 2011 at 5:35 pm

      All this to say, simply, here here!

  • Reply
    Diana Ramos
    22 Jul 2011 at 9:14 am

    I love you. 🙂

  • Reply
    Jade
    22 Jul 2011 at 12:59 am

    The world really is a different place now: it’s normal for people to meet friends and significant others online. I am so happy for you Sara that you followed your heart because whenever I read your posts and see your photographs, I see true happiness.

  • Reply
    Ashling
    22 Jul 2011 at 12:14 am

    So true ^_^

  • Reply
    Jacqueline
    21 Jul 2011 at 5:11 pm

    What a sweet post! I think the internet is such a fantastic way to get to know someone, and it can really lead into a great relationship.

    PS: love how you experiment with your hair! Colors, bangs, etc. Awesome.

  • Reply
    Jennifer
    21 Jul 2011 at 4:54 pm

    I’m so glad you shared this and what you wrote is so very true. Internet friends are just as real and dear as those right next to us. I’ve also met some incredible people online and hope to keep up the friendships as well.

  • Reply
    Melissa
    21 Jul 2011 at 4:13 pm

    This is so beautiful and wonderful. I am only a recent reader of your blog (and I can’t even remember what brought me here!) but I have to say that this post really speaks to me. 10-12 years ago, I lived my life online too. I met so many wonderful and special people and I never saw them face to face. I was made fun of in the real world and people rarely understood. It’s nice that there are those out there who do understand. :]

  • Reply
    Lysha
    21 Jul 2011 at 3:16 pm

    I love everything about this post. I was in the exact same boat as you were ten years ago. It could be really rough, there was a lot of stigma and sometimes concern (from parental types and the like), and its hard enough being an awkward teen!

    But I’ve made some great friends online over the years (like you ;). I’m not as close with some of them as I used to be – but the same can be said for offline friends as well – that’s just life. I had a chance to meet up with some of my online friends for the first time this summer, and although I was pretty anxious at first, it ended up being an absolutely fantastic time. I’m so grateful that all of this technology has allowed me to meet all of these people – 100 years ago I might have missed out on some of m best friends.

  • Reply
    Genevieve
    21 Jul 2011 at 2:43 pm

    I am SOOOOOOOOO thankful and grateful and excited I have “met” you!!

  • Reply
    miss alix
    21 Jul 2011 at 2:30 pm

    i want to say something profound in response to such a touching post, but all i can come up with is i know what you mean. i feel like i’ve come to know so many awesome people through the web and blogs and everything before that. people like you! i feel like many of the people i really connect with are ones i’ve been able to develop relationships with online and get to to know. the internet just bridges location gaps between people who otherwise would get along in person.

  • Reply
    Dani
    21 Jul 2011 at 2:15 pm

    Dude, I’m crying my eyes out at work over this. When you brought this up the other day, it never left my mind. We were never super close (although we knew each other) until I messaged you a few years ago to get help setting up my own website, and I’m SO glad I did that. I looked up to you so much and was so scared to ask for your help, but I cannot put into words how glad I am that I did.

    I feel the exact same about the time I spent on the computer. The skipped homework, lost sleep, and ridicule I got was so worth it even if just to have you as the best friend that you are to me now. I have learned so much over the years from so many people due to my time online, I wouldn’t change any of it.

    I’m so glad I have you. I look forward to so many more years of friendship with you. It’s also through you that I met some folks through LATU, so thank you for that as well. *HUUUUUUG*

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